I need Joe

I need Joe to bark like a dog. I need Joe to bite me. I need Joe to kick my ass all over the gym tonight. St. Thomas is a mere 2 weeks away and things aren't shaping up (ha) like I had planned. I tried on vacation clothes last night. Fuck. We'll leave it at that.

A New Kitchen and A New Liver?

Looks like the kitchen demolition will be taking place soon. It's only been 10 years that we've been in the house, but, I digress. I haven't really decided on a color pattern or style yet, so I better get my rear in gear. I'm looking forward to having a new kitchen, but I'd like to pull a Genie, fold my arms and nod my head and presto! it's finished. However, methinks I'll be suffering through a long and tedious process. Blah.

John and I went out to Cerilli's Friday night. We wanted to see if anything had changes since the major drug bust a couple of months ago. We were quite surprised to find that the wait staff was much more cordial and the prices had been dropped significantly. I did push my lobster around to be sure there wasn't a bag of coke in the sauce, and overall we found the experience to be much nicer. I had a couple of Cosmos, which seemed to be the theme of the weekend. On Saturday, John and I went to our regular place, Casa de Pasta for drinks and dinner. Four cosmos later I staggered out and have no recollection of the ride home. Sunday I met my friend, Gretchen, at the Pub for football and drinks. By the time I knocked back my first Grey Goose dirty martini, the weekend had caught up with me. My liver must be the size of a dime right about now.

And, after reading Brew's Bits , I'm totally jonesing for some chicken wings.

200 Crunches? Are You Insane?

It's been a while since my last post, but I do have a good reason....my muscles have been ripped to shreds and typing has become a problem. My sadist trainer, Joe, has been kicking my ass like there is no tomorrow. Well, there is enough of it to kick, so I guess he's right. And, last night, I truly thought there wasn't going to be a tomorrow. Tuesday is my lower body work out, so I was prepared to really work my legs last night. However, SJ (Sadist Joe) threw me a curve. He decided to mix in ab work in between every leg exercise. So I started the night doing 20 crunches, then 12 "punch crunches" with a 20 lbs weight in each hand (on the ball, crunch and throw a punch across the body), them 10 more crunches, then the dreaded crunch while holding the elastic band behind my head (SJ really enjoys these, he cracks the band like a whip). I'd move to the leg press, do 3 sets, then go back on the ball to do the ab work as described above. An hour of this had taken its toll, and I dragged my spent body home, only to head straight to the bathroom to hurl. Nice. Always a good workout when you blow chunks. And, I had to make my last payment of 500 bucks to him. WTH? Pay and puke?